There are these moments in processing a love relationship break up where a great chasm opens up before us.
A vast hole that feels as though it’s about to swallow us up whole. The magnetism of this, the void space, is formidable and terrifying. We could be entirely consumed by it within a blink of an eye.
In these moments, all the many parts of us that are still hooked into the past love relationship will grasp at any and every remnant of that past love relationship we can get a hold of.
In these moments we often feel that the past love relationship is our very lifeblood, our survival.
These are the moments when we feel compelled to contact our ex-beloved, see them, have that meeting of reawakening love with them (which we have countless times fantasised about). And we can indeed be overcome by this compulsion…..
Or…..
These moments where we stand before this bottomless pit are portals of release, where life is rising up to take the pain of our holding onto the now past love relationship. These are the moments when instead of gripping tighter to the past love relationship, we can loosen our hold of it and it will slip through our fingers. It will slip into this gaping chasm never to be retrieved.
These are the moments when our holding of the past love relationship is truly lost, and our choice to move forward into life is won.
In the processing of love relationship break up there are often a number of moments like this when we stand before the void. It is not as if the love relationship break up pain is gone in one moment. Yet, what is released in these moments of our holding of the love relationship slipping away into the void, is gone. Piece by piece, part by part. What is truly let go of cannot be remade.
In my experience these moments of loosening our grip on life and opening to the void, can be like getting into an overly hot bath. At the beginning there is burning, the pull to run, to flee. Yet in the loosening of our control mechanisms, the melting overcomes us. We are indeed consumed by the experience. Breath by breath. Taken into a true release unto life’s great holding of us.
