O Great Mama Darkness,
I who come before you asking to know you,
Through light,
Through my bringing of light,
Through bringing you to light.
I who come to you time and time again,
Seeking to know you through something other than yourself,
I who look for you through a veil,
I who build a wall through which I ask to see you.
Do I even dare?
Do I even dare to meet you?
Could I even begin to let my eyes look upon you?
Could I be willing to let go of my looking?
To relinquish my eyes,
The very light that lights my eyes,
And release into you, the light that burns in them.
The fire that has lit my way to you,
O To lay this torch down!
To rest in your arms!
To give up the flame that has guided me to your great dwelling!
Can I come there?
Can I let myself drop?
So that I may ever land in you.
And, I could never land in you.
All my fear of falling for eternity,
My fear of never being caught,
Of never being held.
To receive you I would risk it all!
To be lost in you for even one moment,
I would offer all my fear of never being found!
And so I come to you now,
In readiness to let go of all that has brought me here,
In willingness to allow all I have held onto so tightly,
To slip through my fingers.
I let you take it all,
I let you take me,
And inside you,
I have no eyes,
No words.
I am speechless.
I am the orgasm of your dark womb that needs no eyes.
I do not come to you with light.
I come to you in surrender of all my hunger for light.
You are,
And to know you, I shall become you,
Leaving everything I have ever known.
Sadhu Valakhilyas